this is ruining my life and has been for a while now

this is ruining my life and has been for a while now Today was our second day back at school after break and I had a very embarrassing moment in front of my class. We had to introduce a friend in front of everyone and read off a paper about their interests and I thought it was gonna be fine but I stuttered so bad pronouncing this persons name and I knew people were laughing at me. After I stuttered on this kids name I even said f**k me under my breath in frustration right next to the teacher. Pretty sure half the class heard. It was terrible.Throughout high school this has always been why I come to school almost every day feeling anxious. My freshman year I feel like I had to do a lot of speaking in front of people because I had my oral comm class (worst experience of my life) and quite a few classes that we had to present in. They were all hell. This did nothing. Speaking in front of people more didn’t help me, in fact it damaged my confidence so much more and made my stutter 10x worse. My last speech I did in oral com I could barely speak it took me everything to get through it. After I sat back down I broke down crying because of the embarrassment and shame. It sucks. Sophomore and Junior year it never really happened and if I ever got called on to read I would ask to pass and it wouldn’t ever be a problem. This year things have gone smoothly but this was the first time in a long time that I’ve had to do this. And considering I’ve had a high level of anxiety and been in a depression, it didn’t go so well. Normally when It’s the beginning of the school year it’s not a huge problem for me to read a tiny bit and even talk a little in class because it’s a good time of year. I’m confident and playing my sport and although still anxious I am more comfortable facing it. But every year once it gets cold out, it’s like the tiny thought of having to speak up makes my hands swear and I know I’ll end up embarrassing myself if i have to talk, so I get out of it. I’m sick and tired of not having my voice. But I literally cannot force myself to speak more (I always see people say that’s the only way). I’m so afraid of making myself look like a fool in front of my peers. That’s my worst thing. I can’t do it. I have one semester of high school left and I don’t wanna be remembered as the weird shy girl who stutters like she has something wrong with her. I feel like they already kinda do. But I don’t wanna make it worse. I just wanna make it out with as few scars as possible. What can I do? I go through phases where my stutter isn’t that bad and it flares up again, and I thought I was fine but today proved me wrong. Any tips would help a lot. I think my teenage years would of been a whole lot different if I didn’t stutter and I guess that’s what sucks. Any tips on how I can manage this better? I’m honestly desperate.