Mentality to improve?

Mentality to improve? I want to get better and stop letting it control me, but my heart isn't really in it. Like how am I suppose to defeat it when I'm still scared shitless of it. People say that you need to try your hardest to be the best but I mentally can't because my stutter will never go away. Every time I talk to someone and try not to care I'm just burying my anxiety not letting it go. You guys talk about forgiving yourself and stop being afraid, but I can't let go of that fear. Stuttering has power, it changes the social situation in a instant. It makes me uncomfortable every time I try to talk. I can't defeat something that I know I can't beat. So I'm not sure how to cure my stutter.