I kind of know what you mean. I had won this competition in college and I skipped the event as I’d have to go on stage and recite the story that had won me the prize. In retrospect, I believe the experience would have mattered more. No one cares man. Even if you slip up, so what. Something that helps me to this day is telling myself that I won’t be the first person to do it and I won’t be the last. don’t ever think this, although I know it’s hard not to. Big celebrities mess up on stage and laugh it off.