I started as a Physical Therapy Aide, wanted to got to PT School but then realized I was way too small for all that and then became a nurse and now after 7 years will be a nurse practitioner, hopefully in the Airforce for the Next 20 years. Might go to John Hopkins for my Doctorate since I discovered that I am super smart lol. If I'm really lucky, I will be on the maiden voyage to Mars. There is no answer, its mostly about doing the best with what you've got. Of course I am ridiculously privileged, I have 4 great parents, a great husband (messy, but still great), and I'm adorable and healthy as all get out. But I think that you can still find happiness if you bloody minded enough about it. Also getting treatment helps. Depression is thing that doesn't just sort itself out, and yes there are people who can overcome it by sheer will or whatever, but the longer you have it, the more ingrained it becomes and the less likely it is to resolve on its own. You've got to just make yourself the priority and take care of yourself and love yourself first, before expecting anyone else to love you and care. One of the things that I learned too late in life is this: If I let anyone else talk to to me the way I talk to myself, I'd hate them. So why am I surprised I hate myself? Start there. Be kinder to yourself.