I know how it feels. Especially in an atmosphere where you feel like you are doing wrong because you stutter. I used to think that way all the time. "If I know I'm going to stutter than why should I even speak at all"? My own mother used to mock my stutter thinking she was "helping me" It took a very long time for me to get it through to her that it was more important to accept me for who I am and let me stutter. You should take speech therapy slowly and go to whoever makes you feel comfortable. I heard of people who become great friends with their therapist! Also, maybe you should try and get a job somewhere! Prove to them that you can do it! Stuttering is something that I see as something that has made me who I am. I find myself being grateful for the small things in life! I wish you the best of luck my friend. Remember to stay positive and remember that stuttering is okay.