Okay, hang on just a minute... Are you saying that stuttering is a tool to figure out yourself and your relations better, because of the way you feel about how certain interactions (or lack thereof) took place? That's a very fickle thing to tie to stuttering - especially since we know stutter can very wildly between situations and contexts (including seemingly identical ones). There's no stable thread through it all to rely on. So... what you're saying is still possible, though - in that the weight you place on all the mishaps can still indicate how much you appreciate the people or how important you consider the context involved. Sometimes it might just also be about how much the stuttering annoyed you or saddened you in that given instance (it's totally possible to focus on that sort of thing). In other words, I think you should be really careful what you think of the world and yourself in it, if you base it all around your stutter - which isn't as reliable a phenomenon as e.g. the seasons - as a guiding principle, we would want stability and predictability first and foremost. _Not_ random variance. But what you say in general, it can still make sense outside of that. It's just got to be tied to general values and analyses instead of the fickle stuttering that's being used currently.