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Facing My Fears I want to share a thought, from a journey that I embarked on a few months ago and what I’ve learned coming out the other side.. Like I’m sure with many people, growing up I had a stutter that in many ways controlled me through fear of judgment, rejection.. embarrassment and to some extent shame. Struggling with what is a basic human function.. from making friends, ordering a milk shake or the things others don’t even consider. You eventually learn how to cope whether it was social distancing before it was popular, switching words on the fly mid conversation and pausing as if considering the next sentence. The fear I remember feeling was almost palpable, before throwing up before book reports in school lol.. I was lucky enough to have a good support system growing up who pushed me to challenge myself, and not let it hold me back. I know I’m long winded, so I’ll keep this short. I came to a point in my life where I realized that I had wrote off my dream as a life meant for someone else.. someone who didn’t stutter. I had comprised and believed my own lie. So, I found myself one day in a USMC recruiters office, then a number of months later I found myself at Parris Island in boot camp. I came to this conclusion that I had let my stutter rob me of so many opportunities and so much potential that I would be damned if I didn’t try.. I stuttered at every role call, every count we ever did in formation.. out of a platoon of 70. When we first arrived I stuttered for a good solid 10 seconds on the number 175.. as all 175 people who counted before me looked back to see what was taking so long. All my childhood fears culminated in one moment lmao. But, I can officially say I’m a United States Marine with a stutter. So, I guess what I’m saying is don’t give up on yourself and don’t be afraid to step outside of your comfort zone. P.S. I’ve been nicknamed the “Radio Operator” and “Stutters”, and I wear it with a badge of honor. Everyone is supportive of me, and respect the hell out of me for coming as far as I have. All of my sergeants mess with me about it, but you just have to take it in good fun and not take yourself too seriously. Yep, that’s pretty much it. I don’t know where this will take me, but I’ll be damned if I let it hold me back. I also have to recite 10 Prefire Safety procedures verbatim on Monday before an instructor, so wish me luck with that one lol. “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always be what you’ve always been.” UPDATE: I’m graduating from ITB as a 0341 Mortarman and was selected to be given the Sergeant Majors Award at graduation for perseverance. *shrug* things are going kinda well. Stutter and all