First thing first... Do not let your stutter make decisions for you. Especially life decisions. That is the path to regret and self-recrimination. Parent of three. 19F, and twins 15M&F. The girls have absolutely no trace of anything. My son doesn't stutter. He stumbles a bit, but I'm really the only one who has ever noticed. From your post, I'd suggest getting some help to deal with the unresolved issues you have.