Wow... That's a big question. It didn't happen overnight. And just as each of us differs in our stutters and our fluencies, I expect my process / path differs as well. As such, none of this is gospel. It's just my experience and process. It's never just one thing. Nothing in life is. Everything moment is a convergence of personalities and pressures. Your path to change is a collection of those moments. I got fluent in my mid-20s after being a lifelong stutterer. And not all that much changed. My social groups didn't suddenly explode. My career didn't take off. I wasn't suddenly someone else. My stutter wasn't the whole of me. I was still carrying a lot of anger. I was still hyper-focused on what I was going to say, at the expense of not really listening to others. My listening was more akin to waiting for my chance to talk. I'd been waiting my whole life to talk. It's a hard habit to break. Overthinking what I'm going to say, while only half listening to others. When you aren't paying attention to others, they pick up on it. They reciprocate. Stutterers sometimes mistake that for being ignored due to their stutter. I'm not saying stutterers don't get ignored. But it's not *always* because of stuttering. Everyone gets ignored. You can sit back in a group and see it happen. There's a saying "What other people think of you is none of your business." Remember that one. Do many people know what you think of them? It's arrogant for me to assume I know what others are thinking. I am prone to letting a train of thought get rolling and running away, out of control. I call this "wrong think" and I have to actively stop myself when I hear the train whistle. "Wrong Think" includes dwelling on bad fluency moments. or imagining what others are thinking. or imagining how the conversation could have gone. It's really hard to change. It takes time. IDK if that answers your question. I hope this doesn't ring hollow coming from someone who has learned fluency. I participate in this sub to offer help and encouragement.