The years you are in now was the hardest for me. I was in a similar place as you. All I can say is it gets better. You learn to deal with your stutter, accept it, and accept yourself. Going to an intensive speech therapy program for two weeks changed my life. I would try and attend a program like the one offered by American Institute of Stuttering in NYC. You can even speak to a therapist over Skype from AIS if you aren't local. I'm 30 now and I live a pretty happy life, despite my stutter. You can do it man, hang in there. Stuttering can teach you a lot and I think we become better people for it. You might want to Google Lee Lovett and his book. He offers free therapy over Skype and his students seem to have a lot of success.