Is it possible for a stutterer to live a normal life? I am so frustrated and depressed.
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Is it possible for a stutterer to live a normal life? I am so frustrated and depressed. Is it possible for a person with a severe stutter to live a normal, wholesome life, just like everyone else? By that I mean having friends, going on dates, and being able to function verbally in situations? Let me explain. I'm a 24 year old guy. I have been stuttering from the age of 5. However its never stopped me from doing anything. I still had friends throughout school, I used to play outside, I could talk in situations (like ordering food at restaurants), I had a girlfriend when I was 15 and I could socialize with people with ease. And other kids at school would sometimes imitate my stutter and poke fun, and it did not bother me in the slightest bit....because I myself knew that stuttering sounded funny and that's why they were laughing at me. I took no offense to it. Then when I turned 17, it all changed. At this age I became incredibly self conscious and I started to see my stutter as a problem. I also went through a rough patch around this time because I was suffering from major OCD and anxiety problems. Before I was 17, I did not see my stutter as a problem. I just saw it as a trait in my personality. Sometimes adults would tell me to go to speech therapy to fix it, but I'd just think '' I don't have a problem with it so I don't wanna waste time going to speech therapy '' So ever since I turned 17, I have not been living a normal, wholesome life. I have been living a handicapped life. I don't have that many friends who I talk to every day. No girlfriend. I cannot socialize easily with people anymore, because I cannot have conversations with them because of the stutter. Now even simple tasks like ordering food at restaurants, or asking for directions on the street is a huge ordeal for me. It's funny because the stutter has always been there in my life. The only difference now is that I SEE the stutter. Whereas before I was 17, I did not see it as an obstacle. I always knew it was there. Right now my stutter is horribly severe. I stutter on nearly every word. I prolong vowel sounds for a long time. Sometimes I cannot even finish sentences and when people see me literally panting and gasping for breath, they finish sentences for me because the words simply don't come out no matter how many repetitions take place. My chest and abdomen hurt from stuttering, that's how bad it is! When I am alone in my room, I can talk with ease. I have recorded myself doing voice impressions too. I can talk like Yoda and Kermit the Frog. All of that is good. But when I get in front of another real person, this fluency goes away and I start severely stuttering. I know that you cannot get rid of a stutter completely. I know the best way to overcome it is to simply accept it and not be ashamed of it. Someone here said something very profound a couple of days back....'' Work WITH the stutter. Not Against it. '' So I understand all that. I don't care if I stutter...I know I will always be a little unorthodox in my speech. I just want the ability to go out there and talk to people, ask women out, and make friends. How do I do this? Do you think I should just be flamboyant with my speech? Should I talk to people using voice impressions? To do something like that, you need earth-shaking confidence (and my self esteem is very low). And a lot of people would get freaked out and wonder why I'm talking like that. So there's a lot of stigma regarding that. Is there a way out!? I am so frustrated and feeling hopeless. I'm lonely too. I just want to live life, have friends I can talk to and get into relationships. Some have said avoidance reduction therapy. I know it works. There have been times where I've had consecutive days of talking and exposure to social situations. And after 4 or 5 days of consecutive talking, my stutter becomes much easier to deal with. Talking becomes easier and less stressful. However the effect of this is temporary. If I were to go 3 days without talking, then my stutter becomes powerful again and all of that progress seems to be a waste. And I cannot go on talking and socializing every day, because sometimes you just don't have the opportunity. So what do I do? How do I overcome this with all these complications? Has anyone here found a way? I also have social anxiety disorder by the way. So that complicates this issue even more.