How can I listen to myself and become more aware of my stammering?

How can I listen to myself and become more aware of my stammering? Hello, I want to become more familiar with my stammering and I want to identify what specifically is causing me so many problems. I don’t have anybody that I trust to listen to me speaking so I plan to record myself speaking and the take note of what sounds are catching me out, what do I do wrong, when do I het most caught out and so on. In my mind, everything is a problem so I can’t actually focus on anything specific. The problem is I have a bit of a phobia of listening to myself talk. I am a bit worried that I will feel too upset to actually think about what I am saying. How can I acclimatise myself to the sound of my own voice? Is it really so surprising for other people too or can you listen to yourself without any worries? Thanks!