>my stutter causes me to hesitate and repeat myself and it causes me to strain and drag onto letters and vowels and it makes me wanna die inside when i have to talk.. If he doesn't mind the stutter you might have to choose what's the stronger, your desire to talk to him or avoiding that feeling of wanting to die. If you don't think you can do that then maybe you need to time working in your relationship with your speech (with a good SLP). I'd recommend you take the chance and try speaking with him anyway, letting yourself stutter and trying your best not to control it. If he is as sweet as you sound, you can probably open up to him a little about how you're feeling.