commentr/StutterSeptember 9, 2022

Content

Worst moments in my life regarding the stutter weirdly aren't huge moments but sort of a myriad of minor incidents and people's reaction to them. trying to ask for a bus ticket, trying to order food, telling the people the time if they asked me on the street, etc. the worst of it would have been school because you never really knew when you'd have to say something, whether it be to a teacher or someone you were trying to be friends with, and the embarrassment that would come with that. I remember quite vividly when I had detention for the first time in secondary/high school and it took what felt like 5 minutes for register my name, and because of the way my stutter sounded the teacher in charge ended up just declaring me to be "Ed" (I am not called Ed lol). Whole room erupted in laughter. It's not the worst a stutterer has received I'm sure but it was so frustrating to be denied the use of my own name because of it. Felt very shamed - which I guess is a lot of the stress with stuttering, I feel a lot of it is self-inflicted due to how you think others perceive you Generally though I've never not had friends or had difficulty in relationships because of it. Friends and family have always been understanding and quite intuitive with how to deal with it, and in my experience girls have always found it to be sort of cute (fortunately by the time I was interested in girls my stutter wasn't anywhere near as severe as it had been in my early years so). I've definitely been bullied, but I've found it was largely by people who were already bullies themselves, rather than it being actual ire from anyone decent

Themes

Emotional ExperienceIdentity & DisabilitySchool & WorkAnticipation & Avoidance

Subthemes

Shame & EmbarrassmentStigma & BullyingSchool & Academic LifeHiding & ConcealmentAnxiety & Social Judgment

Codes (3)

intimidation_authorityordering_service_encountersaying_name_introduction