How can I accept something that I despise so much? How can I accept something that has ruined my life and continues to do so? Well, because the alternative is worse than accepting the situation. Look where the fear, anxiety, and the allowance of letting your stutter define you has taken you. You’ve dropped out of college because of it, your confidence, self esteem, and all around love for yourself is at its lowest because of it. But it’s not necessarily the stutter that has caused those things. It’s you and how you view your stutter, and more so how you allow it to control your life. You wouldn’t walk up to Joe Biden (a stutterer) and say, “man it really fuckin sucks that our stutter makes us so depressed, doesn’t it?” He’d probably look at you with a confused and concerned look on his face. Joe didn’t get where he is in life now from dealing with all the things you said above, rather, he didn’t let his stutter define who he is as a person. He didn’t let it control his thoughts and his actions in every decision he made. Though I’m sure like you or I, he probably wishes he didn’t have a stutter to begin with. A blind man would waste his entire life wishing he weren’t blind, never utilizing his other 3 senses to enjoy what he can. You see, we don’t really have a say, or a choice in the matter. The only choice you do have is how you deal with your stutter, and how much you allow it to effect your life. If this comes off as rude I have no intention of that, I am frankly a very blunt and honest person, and wish someone had said what I’m saying to you, to me sooner. I’ll take freedom over fluency Please feel free to ask any questions