It is the pity that hurts. It is the being misunderstood. It's being asked a question you can answer perfectly in your head but your mouth is physically locked. It's your friends and people you admire thinking worse of you because you couldn't answer a question, or you had to give a shit answer because you couldn't say what you actually wanted to. It's the conditioning and erosion of your self esteem that takes place after you feel looked down upon by so many people. It's the feeling that you'll never be normal, and you'll never get to experience what normal people experience. It's becoming shy and nervous when you're not a shy and nervous person, because so many people think the reason you stutter is shyness or nervousness. Your whole willpower gets fucked, honestly. I can't say what I want; I can't do what I want. I will never have be normal, And it's not my fault.