Stop feeling hopeless. You need to understand that being human means being 3 separate entities. The mind, the body, and the soul. Ur mind and body are in conflict with each other and the soul is hurting because of it. You need to make all 3 work together. Be the guardian of your mind. Only allow in what will help you. When you feel negative and defeated. Just stop. You'll always stutter. But like with anger you can learn to control it, sure itll come out once in awhile but you can calm yourself down then it wont be a problem for you.