Very touching stories I can relate to you guys. I'd like to add another thing about my speech that basically almost eliminates my stutter, but makes me sound really slow or like I have something wrong with me. When I feel a word that I'm going to stutter on that's coming up, I usually take a long pause, like a very long pause before saying the word because it eventually comes out but it can very greatly from 4 seconds to 12 seconds. I end up holding my breath during that period trying to get that word out. The reason why I don't want to do this is because people think I'm done talking, or I'm ignoring/not saying anything to someone. I can rid myself of a stutter this way but I honestly don't even know if it's worth it. Like in class if I'm called on to read, and I see the first word, you will see my mouth open and I'll just sit there, for a long time looking at the word telling my brain to say it, and eventually, it does come out but takes like 10 seconds! It's really embarrassing and people think I can't read or I don't know what a word is when it can be as simple as the word "red". Same thing happens with my name, if I'm asked my name which is "Chris", I'll just sit there and look around in the air trying to get my name out while I'm completely silent, and when it does come out, people make jokes as to if I forgot my name or not. Or they look at you with the weirdest look like is something severely wrong with your brain? More examples would be having to say my birth date, and the day is the worst part which is the 17th. Or answering a question on worksheet that I have written down, like the number 4. My classmates can see that I have a 4 on my page and are probably wondering like, why isn't he saying it? Because it's so simple and basic and everybody knows it! But I just wait an extremely long time, or else I'll stutter like a madman. Also if I want to ask a question to a person, or tell someone where something is, who's going where, anything it's all the same situation! I literally never try ordering food because of the long pauses I take before even getting the word out. I really want this to go away, like really damn badly man... IMO it's worse than stuttering because people look at you and it's like your freaking frozen! I don't know what to do at this point... I'm currently meeting with a speech pathologist in my school, and I've read articles, which I did have some mild stutters but most was just me pausing and waiting for the word to get out. When it came to having a conversation while she was evaluating me, it was about the same thing, pauses before saying words which makes me sound really choppy, and I just don't sound fluent at all. I substituted a lot of words and they weren't the words I actually wanted to say to express myself! Hell I sound like I'm a 6 year old! She even said that she thinks I don't really have that bad of a stuttering problem, but it's all in my head. That I think I sound worse than I really do. Which may relate to the traumatizing experience I had in 7th grade. Honestly, this pausing shit has controlled me since my stuttering began, and I just want it to go away. I just want to speak! I want to speak freely and say the words that I want to say! Instead of substituting everything. I don't understand how people can live life like this, especially as an adult! My dream is to become an actor, but it seems this pausing and stuttering have basically destroyed and crushed my life, and everything I want to do with it when I grow up...