*You mention suicide, so I have to mention r/SuicideWatch.* ---   A couple of remarks here, if I may.   >living life with a 10 year old vocabulary because I can’t say other words due to my stutter Are you avoiding the words you feel like will cause a stutter or increase the likelihood of a stutter? - >I sound like an idiot to people when i start stuttering What happens if you stutter - do people still listen? Do they understand what you're saying? Are you able to get your points across despite stuttering? - >others present so fluently effortlessly Well, others can spout nonsense even if they're fluent. So, fluency is merely one of the parameters going into succesful communication. Don't measure yourself to others on just one parameter - or rather, don't measure yourself at all. Figure out if you meet your goals for whatever communicatory function you're performing. - >wish there was a cure The "solution" to stutter isn't to remove the stutter. That's not how it works, and it's not fruitful to think like that. You have to work with your condition, not try to deny it. Have you ever visited a speech therapist? You may benefit from such a process, if you want to manage your stutter constructively.