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LIFE OF 17 YEAR OLD STUTTERER **About myself** im turning 18 this july, ive graduated school last week. Ive been stuttering my whole life starting from the age of 4. As a kid i never cared about my stuttering and my parents told it would eventually go. unfortunately it is still with me in this very moment. As i grew older i understood i couldnt communicate with people properly and it affected me alot. Im a very smart person, i have so many ideas that i want to share to people but im being defeated every single day by this stutter. i will avoid most social gatherings to avoid people seeing my stutter. **how my speech works:** My stutter is not that serious. i can speak with no stutter in a flow state but it will kick in the most random time and the most random word. its like walking in a broken bridge that can fall any time.Also i noticed i stutter less to certain people but stutter more around people who i dont like or is completely new to me.Im a very handsome man standing 5'6 and girls often stare at me and approaches me but little do they know i cant speak fluently. Most of times i just avoid speaking to them at all which is the reason why im staying single till now.The most depressing part is i cant say my name fluently.people will often compliment my looks and ask my name but i just cant answer them at times.Now its like a new phase of stutter that i cant say my name which i could say fluently until this year. also i never managed to say the name of my hometown without stuttering when it comes to buying tickets back home in bus like the word wouldnt jus come out. I wont be stuttering when im talking to myself in my room and id be the most fluent person alive but not the in real time situations. im a singer too but i dont even stuter while im singing which made one of my friend ask that why id stutter in speech and not in singing which made me completely speechless. **SPEECH THERAPY** ive went speech therapy when i was in 7th grade (2019) but it never helped me because what they said to me is slow down and take a deep breath and made me read books infront of them aloud which i knew it was all pointless. the actual thing is i cant get that word out of my mouth even though i slow myself take a deep breath, the word jus stays there and i need to block/stutter finally to get that word out. i didnt waste my time and stopped speech therapy when pandemic hit. Please help me if you can ive researched alot about stuttering and i never got a real solution to it. all what it says its either linked to your brain functioning or pyschological factors but whatever it is its affecting me alot. After a few months im going to college and i have no idea what to do with my stutter. ive never been this concerned about my stutter in my whole life. maybe god please help me.