commentr/StutterFebruary 19, 2019

Content

I understand your anger at other people. We are all often caught up in our own lives to notice what is going on in others, especially when so many of us try to hide our problems from each other. Stuttering is not a problem that is always so easy to hide. I'm not sure about the severity of your stutter, how old you are, how much effort you put into working on your speech every day, and the people you are surrounded by. One of my part-time jobs right now is as a cashier. I talk to over a hundred people a day, and I can tell you that my fluency largely depends on myself. How I am feeling that day, how much I work on being fluent, how I react to other people, if I've had coffee in the morning. My top two external factors that make my speech worse in the moment include high-stress situations and scary people. I know that if I continue to work on my fluency in those situations, it will get better with time and experience. People are going to be people. You cannot control how other people treat you, talk to you, etc. but what you can control, or learn to control more, is your reaction to them. I completely understand how difficult it can be when people interrupt you or try to finish your sentences for you and they're wrong, etc. Take a second to recollect yourself and get back to a feeling of neutrality, or if it's appropriate, use that anger to get your point across. There's nothing wrong with being rightly upset. Don't let people walk over you, but you do need to pick your battles. It's a harsh realization, but we are ultimately responsible for ourselves, no matter how shitty other people are, whether they realize they're being shitty or not. That being said, we need to take good care of ourselves. Being a victim only keeps you down. Empower yourself by not letting other people bring you down, and if they do, bring yourself right back up. I do this all day, every day. I'm literally an emotional rollercoaster but I put in a lot of effort to ride the highs rather than the lows and I feel better off for it, and I notice its effects in how fluent I am. Being silly and weird helps, too. Anyone who doesn't like me or doesn't give a shit about me can just suck it :))) In all seriousness, I hope you find some peace. Message me if you want to talk.

Themes

Causes & VariabilityAnticipation & AvoidanceEmotional ExperienceIdentity & Disability

Subthemes

Stress & Fight/FlightOverthinking & MonitoringFrustration & AngerHope & MotivationAcceptance & Pride

Codes (2)

intimidation_authorityordering_service_encounter