Hi there. I think we can pretty much all relate to what you are pondering. The desire to be accepted and valued for who you are. A key message on Reddit has been stammering is part of who you are, not all of who you are. From my experience, I realise the fear of disclosure is something that has been amplified in my own mind and does not tally with the reaction I have had from meaningful others I have shared my truth with. I have often wondered. The people whom I have not disclosed to, do they know I have difficulty from time to time or is it blatantly obvious. I think it is sometimes and therefore a disclosure in itself I guess. I have always been interested in disclosure and went so far to write about it for my degree dissertation. For what it’s worth, the research suggests disclosure can be enormously beneficial for both listener and person who stammers. In theory, yes but as we know, in practice much harder or at least it can be. I digress…. My hunch would be if you tell him, it will take pressure of you to be perceived as fluent. You mention you think he has observed stammering via video call. By any chance, have these calls aggravated your stammering in a way you might not have anticipated. Just asking as this has been my experience sometimes… He sounds like a good guy and as others have noted, relationships are much more about than speech/stammering etc…what you both bring to it. Respect, fun, shared interests etc….while, we might fear it’s a deal breaker, for others, I have learned it is not and never was…. Go for it….be proud of yourself for doing so. I do recognise you would be taking a huge risk, because all this matters to you. I suspect it could be a turning point for you…