It is ok to think about it once in a blue moon but dont do it more often. It is unhealthy. I dont think about it at all, I have a good life. Speaking is just part of you. Your goal number one should be desensitize yourself. Which means you wont feel bad and stupid after you stuttered. The next time tell yourself: "Ok, in this situation I will probably stutter. Never mind, I will not feel bad after that." \- If you will ignore these negative thoughts, they will eventually disappear. Fake it until you make it. I would recommend you mindfullness meditation, it will teach you how to deal with anxiety, embaressment and similar. It will help you. Please, do it and in few months send a PM with "thank you, it really helped" :)