This is the way. I've been married for longer than a lot of people in this sub have probably been alive, and I used to be so covert that my husband didn't even know I stuttered for several years. Finally one night, unable to substitute a word for what I wanted to say and in utter shame, I broke down sobbing. He was amazed when I told him I stuttered and at first tried to argue that I didn't *really* stutter because I was so good at avoiding it. But finally he got it: avoiding the stutter came at a great cost. It meant I often kept silent when I might have wanted to speak. It meant I was always thinking ahead about my next words -- trying to frantically substitute problem ones for words that might sound weird or out of place, but at least I could say them. It meant that I often pretended I'd forgotten what I was going to say, which made me look stupid or ditzy. I've never understood why we should feel ashamed of stuttering, except that there's still so much misinformation about it. We see it as a personal failing, and it isn't. It's a neurological disorder. Most stutterers are born with it and it starts showing itself in early childhood, when speech becomes more complex. *It's not our fault.* I mean, I get it. It's a pain. It's embarrassing. People often don't understand and might laugh. But these days I refuse to substitute words anymore. If I stutter, so be it. I'd rather say what I want, even if it's a struggle to get it out sometimes. I'm also much more likely to disclose that I stutter -- and once you're an adult, most people genuinely don't care; they're happy to give you a bit of time and space. I had to come to this in my own time. And the weird thing is, I realised recently that if I had a magic genie and three wishes, or even five wishes, getting rid of my stutter probably wouldn't even occur to me. Maybe if I had ten or fifteen wishes, LOL. It's just part of me now, and honestly not that big a deal. I don't say that to make light of anyone's struggle here. I know what it's like, trust me. I've had humiliating moments just like the rest of you. I guess, though, that with age and learning to accept it, it's ceased having power over me. It's part of me and I like me. Sorry for the long post! I don't usually write novels on Reddit. :)