Hey buddy, hang in there! I’m just gonna echo what others have said: I’m sorry for the way you are treated by people around you, but don’t take it personally if they are attacking/mistreating you because of something you have no control of (fluencism?) but of course also reflecting on what else you can improve on as a person is vital. Unfortunately for me my stutter is not consistent, meaning some days I’m free and some days it’s baaaad. I highly suggest you join a support group or befriend another stutterer, not necessarily to be BFF but someone who understands the struggle with whom you can vent with. At age of 20 you should start to have more control on who and what you let in your life. I finished uni not that long ago and I can confidently say that stutter hindered my job hunting. It stings when I hear conversations flowing freely among people, but it encourage me to find my own way to communicate more effectively - whether in emails, or turning my speech/proposal/response into a subtle tune. Suicide is way overrated. You’ve got one life and everyone has their own set of problems and challenges, so do as much as you like to work on it but don’t let resentment become your life. You are not alone!