Hello My friend I feel like you are being way to hard on yourself. Be kind to yourself. I have dealt with mental health issues most of my life. These are three non-med things that help me. 1) write a journal. It helps me get the mess out of my head and onto something else. Things make more sense. 2) exercise go for a walk, lift weights, whatever works for you. When you exercise your mind releases endorphins that help you feel better. Do this on a schedule and try to stick to it as best you can. 3) have a set schedule for yourself. Get up and go to bed at the same time. Personally whenever I get out of my schedule my mental health is thrown out of whack. I wish you the best of luck