I am not a man and never felt like one, but I am who I am. I can be loud and gregarious and exhausting, or I can be calm and thoughtful and chill. But most of the timeII am all of these things because thats me, not because I need someone elses approval. The thing that I feel is at the root of your discomfort lies in the way a lot of young people socialize nowadays. Gone are the days of just hanging out with some like-minded peeps talking about your future dreams and ideas and the girls you have a crush on. Now it's just escapism and trying to keep up with Tinder creatures, people who hang out in loud bars and get drunk and talk as loudly as possible with 1000 TV screens blaring at the same time. Even when you meet someone, you are trying so hard to give them everything you've got to keep them interested which is abnormal. People are mysteries and relationships should take time and effort. I have been in that scene once or twice and its exhausting. To the point that I'll even call the cops to my own goddam party so I can get rid of the vapids. In other words, You are not alone. The fact that you stutter makes it worse for sure, but I think at least 70% of young people feel the same way. Thats why you dont see alot of people in relationships at the clubs, or out trying hard to get "respect." They at their house sleeping. 30% are vapid idiots who make you feel that you have to keep up and are the ones screaming and attracting attention and **finessing** their way to some semblance of respect. Trust me, most sensible people stay away from these types. they are con-men and women, with severe mental illness and are just basically click bait.Theres nothing there behind the facade. My advice is that you find your tribe. Find something that you are good at... maybe volunteering, maybe D&D, maybe bonsai, go to meet ups or join clubs that are focussed on something other than just being loud. Invest in yourself, take a college class. Meet people of many ages and walks of life and grow yourself. I have found that most respectable people, talk the least and listen the most. The quietest people are the ones everyone listens to because they speak with passion and conviction and KNOWLEDGE rather than drivel- and thats what garners respect. I am a natural extrovert and naturally attract people. I make friends everywhere I go, my mother thinks its low key magical. But I dont care about their respect for me. Its not a quid pro quo. They are just people living their own complex lives and I dont need their respect. In fact, I get picked on for being a nerd all the time, but guess who gets called to help the kids with their college papers....? Me. They respect me in their own way I guess. Someone ones said to me that you are like a tree. Majority of your friends are like leaves, They are only there for a season. But the only people who's opinion you should care about are like roots. And you only need a few good ones to keep you going through life. I think that it would help you to find a few good friends rather than try to be the king of the mountain in a group people that mostly don't even care.