thank you so much for your message. now i’m mostly thinking about dropping out and try for a major where i don’t have to socialize a lot with people (i’m studying psychology atm). I tried to talk with my professor to see if I can do the presentation just in front of him and i’m waiting for an answer. I’ve already seen a neuropsychologist, a three/four psychologists and one speech therapist. The only one who really helped me was a psychologist i was seeing when i was in middle school, she told me to meditate everyday and at the start of every session, we did some muscle relaxation exercises together (and it really worked). Then i had to stop seeing her and even if i tried to redo the same exercises, nothing changed. The last one I saw was the speech therapist (from 15 to 18 yo). She helped me to manage my stutter but i was still scared to talk to other people, so at the end it wasn’t really efficient. I never tried to seek for help again mostly because of my parents’ behavior even if i’m independent (they’re always saying that it’s my fault and i’m not trying enough, i’m just wasting their money) And thanks again for your comment, it’s the first time talking with someone without feeling judged.