The art of 'pre-acceptance' 🎨 🖼

The art of 'pre-acceptance' 🎨 🖼 The art of 'pre-acceptance' 🎨 🖼 Have you ever found yourself stuttering a lot out of control? I am sure of one thing. You didn't pre-accept. Pre-acceptance is when you take time before speaking or interacting to accept every possible outcome/result you wish to avoid. For example. About a year ago I was working with someone who stuttered, I'll keep his name private. About 2-3 weeks into working together, I actually found his speech getting worse. Which can be common from time to time with people who are working on their speech in a very holistic way. But this was different. I could feel it was different. So I took some hours to understand what exactly is going through his brain. Where the tension is caught and where the resistance is. After some digging we found the real issue. He didn't pre-accept his biggest fear. His biggest fear was that he wouldn't get results. That after we worked together, he would be in the same spot. And because this was such an overwhelming fear.. That's all his mind was focusing on (what you resist, persists). So it didn't matter how much value I gave him, or the amount of stuff we did together, he was still focused on the fear of this not lasting or working. He created such a vivid mental image of what that outcome of not seeing results would see/feel like that he was creating that outcome incidentally. It wasn't until we really sat down and created a reality where he REALLY didn't see results. I made him imagine saying goodbye to me and leaving my coaching.. with 0 new knowledge and his speech and confidence exactly the same. Being as vivid as possible. "Okay now I feel it." He would say once he brought that to mind. "Okay, now I really want to you live in this reality, I want you to continue going to work, continue speaking to your friends and family. How does it feel?" I asked "It sucks. I'm mad, I feel lost, and I don't know what to do, I feel like I lost hope." "I understand.. are you able to continue living?"  I asked "I don't know" he responded "How were you living before coming to me?" "I was living, but it was painful and I hated it." "Would it be possible to continue living like that?" "I guess" he answered painfully "Yes or no?" I asked again. "Yes". "Okay great." 👆This was a form of pre acceptance👆 He accepted the painful, worst case scenario reality (took him a few weeks to emotionally accept it). He realized he would still be able to continue living and he would be fine. Life would suck, but he would be fine. He realized that in his own mind. The next few weeks we worked together, he completely transformed. Not like magic, but kind of like magic.. He let his foot off the brake pedal. He was no longer holding onto his biggest fear. He was no longer giving it power by resistance. This allowed his to let go and fully take in everything. It's the same thing with you when it comes speaking and stuttering. If you are unable to accept before you speak that you may stutter and people may laugh and mock you.. then this huge fear will lead you to creating more of these results. The greatest interference (doubt, anxiety, anticipating) when speaking comes from the fear of unwanted results (judgements, stuttering etc). And once you can say to yourself "I'll be fine, I'll continue to keep living" if these unwanted results happen.. that is when the interference stops and you can express yourself naturally. Because like I always say.. we already know how to speak naturally and effortlessly, working on stuttering is about letting go of the interference that stops us from doing so. Working on the art of pre-acceptance is a big peice of the puzzle. Let me know if this was valuable.