Hey mate I have a very similar situation, I'm 28M and would say my stutter has been much worse since age of 24. (I've had it since I was 10) I mostly speak too fast and repeat syllables with my stutter. I occasionally block, but usually only with starting conversations. I think the biggest hurdle that you are facing is your negativity towards yourself, you need to be a lot kinder to yourself every time it happens. It can create a vicious circle which can create more stuttering. Maybe try noting down your feelings and emotions when it happens, and then think about how you can see the positives from the conversation. For example, I work as a pharmacist in the community, I often give advice for minor ailments and quite often I may struggle with certain words. Often the customer doesn't care about my stutter as they appreciate the advice and as long as I give them enough quality in what I'm saying I usually feel happy afterwards. Please don't aim to hide it, I know it would be amazing if we could believe me, but just focus on gradually improving elements of your stutter, i.e tempo or using alternative words. The only way to tackle this fear is to be positive with yourself, perhaps see if your mental health is contributing. I also barely have any friends for the same reason, I think finding a new sport/hobby will definitely make us feel better haha, I've set myself a deadline to do something new. I feel having more things to do in life makes conversations less awkward, because honestly I go off on weird stilted conversations about shit I don't know much about 😂. Hope this helps, please don't feel alone with this, I also was hoping to overcome this.