You are not alone my friend. Have you met any other people who stutter, and/or have you been to any support groups? NSA (National Stuttering Association) has many chapters, basically support groups, around the country, and their annual conference is coming up in a few months which is an amazing time for pws. I'm a 38 year old pws, a co-founder and co-leader of one of these chapters. It's changed my life.