postr/StutterJuly 8, 2020

Everything I hate about stutter.

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Content

Everything I hate about stutter. I hate stutter. I hate that I cant order something I like because of shame and end up ordering the first thing on menu that sounds easy to say. I hate that I cant do phone calls, because I know I wouldnt say one word. I hate that I studied a looot and have master degree but I cant find a job now. I hate that when meeting new people I feel very anxious because I will have to say my name - and saying my name in front of strangers seems mission impossible. I hate that I have to pretend I dont know some ansmwer, just because I dont wanna feel awkard and ashamed because of my stutter. I hate that I have to pretend to be an introvert, if I was born to be an extrovert. I hate that I am scared to have children (although I loveee kids), because I know I will have to speak more and have bigger responsability. I hate I lost some career opportunities just because stutter held me back. I hate that I think about stutter 24/7. I hate I am constantly feeling like I am missing the good in life. I hate I cant enjoy life 100%. I hate I have to live life like this. I just hate.

Themes

Anticipation & AvoidanceCauses & VariabilityEmotional Experience

Subthemes

Feared Words & NamesAvoidance & SubstitutionHiding & ConcealmentOverthinking & MonitoringPropositionality & WeightShame & Embarrassment

Codes (4)

intimidation_authorityordering_service_encountersaying_name_introductiontelephone_video