Feeling suicidal

Feeling suicidal My math professor used to slap me in the back of my head for not getting good grades. (I was perfectly normal until I was 15). I don't know if that was the reason behind my stammering. I used to fear going to his classes just because of the beatings. Later, I developed anxiety and depression because of his classes. Now my whole life is a mess. I'm currently 22. I'm feeling suicidal.