I felt the same way before I found good help. The good news is, this feeling isn't inevitable. I'm at a place now where I can freely communicate and it doesn't totally drain me or take a huge emotional toll. And I still stutter roughly the same amount as always (fairly severe). I tried working on it in my own but I needed a professionals help, one who really understand the issues and knew how to help me. My advice is if this is the biggest issue in your life, find some help. Getting involved with the NSA, listening to stuttertalk postcast, hearing from people who have made progress. These are all things that helped me and taught me what I need to look for in seeking help.