It sounds like you are really getting down. I am so sorry, stranger. One really needs to go out and engage with people. It's that necessary dopamine rush we all get when talking with strangers that helps keep us mentally fit. Have you tried any of the following? a [meetup.com](http://meetup.com) group and you can message the host in advance and let them know your speech challenges? Maybe one that there is little talking like hiking or bird watching? You got to get out of the house and be with some kind patient people in an area that interests you. Also, therapy. If you do a zoom appointment, you always have the option to use the chat window. You've got this! You gotta get out and be in the fresh air. We all were inside too much during Covid and it messed with our depression levels. You aren't alone. You just gotta get moving and doing something. Try a local speech group through the national stuttering website. You can do it!