commentr/StutterOctober 11, 2018

Content

Preface: This is not coming from a perspective of any gender having it 'easier' or 'harder'. This is just my experience as a woman who stutters, some downsides that maybe a lot of guys don't experience in the same way. 1. It can be difficult to find an entry-level job (especially in my rural area) because, as women, we are most commonly placed in a position of representing a business with our looks and voices and personalities. Example: Waitresses, cashiers, secretaries, administrative assistants, bartender, etc. These are all common entry-level jobs for women. It is easiest to find a job as a woman if you are personable and fluent. If you aren't, then a lot of entry level places seem to have issues placing you. It was very difficult for me to get started in my field as a beginner, because I wasn't experienced enough to *only* being doing my field, but the supplementary option of customer relations was also not ideal. If I were a man, they'd probably just put me in a labor position. But as a woman? How can I serve a company fully? According to most, I simply couldn't. 2. Dating-wise, it can be difficult to fully express your consent or non-consent in ways that fluent speakers probably wouldn't find issue with. When you're out with a guy three times your size and could probably overpower you with a single forearm, that can feel very iffy. To add to that, predators are drawn to vulnerabilities, and a stutter seems to be a big flashing sign for one, where certain guys assume you're intellectually disabled, and therefor easily manipulated. This can make for some dicey situations when you're maybe not able to clearly and assertively express your non-consent. 3. Stuttering spaces are overwhelmingly male. This makes for a lot of, "But are you a *real* stutterer?" Or maybe even a little, "Why are you complaining? It's so much easier as a woman. You have boobs, you can get a job and a partner with a snap of your fingers." A lot of our experiences are frequently disregarded as Not As Bad As Mine. And that's even beside showing up in a support group and then getting hit on by someone you need to awkwardly and non-fluently turn down. It's just not as much of a safe space as it's meant to be. As a result, many women may skip these communities altogether. Which is a shame, because finding people who share your experiences is a really powerful step to accepting your stutter. I reckon other than that, there's not much difference. And I'm sure male stutterers have their own gender-specific cultural fuckities. Hope this has been informative! And for what it's worth, I find it really great that you've thought to ask :D

Themes

School & WorkSocial & RelationshipsIdentity & Disability

Subthemes

Employment & CareerDating & RomanceIdentity & Self-Perception