postr/StutterApril 28, 2022

If I can't express myself than what am I good for?

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Content

If I can't express myself than what am I good for? I'm a university student who wanted to achieve high grades to prove to people that I'm smart and not dumb because I'm quite most of the time and stutter while speaking. My GPA is fairly high and this is my senior year. I'm starting to realise that I'm not good at explaining stuff to other people, I can't present any of my work, and I can't express my opinion without making a mess. This made me lose motivation to learn anything and I'm just overwhelmed by this feeling. People who don't stutter will probably land jobs and have more chances to prove themselves. I literally do a whole group project solo just to stutter in every single letter when presenting it and the professors think that I didn't prepare well.Also I try to keep eye contact while presenting and I see other people looking at me but as soon as I stutter they break eye contact. It makes me feel bad that I'm causing discomfort between whoever is watching me present. And then there are the people who laugh.But the eye contact thing hurts the most, even in normal convos it's like I don't wanna make the situation awkward but I can't help it. Then I start degrading myself for making people uncomfortable around me and think less of myself because of my stutter. I like communicating with people but stuttering makes it tough for me. If I can't express myself than what am I good for?

Themes

Anticipation & AvoidanceCauses & VariabilityEmotional Experience

Subthemes

Hiding & ConcealmentOverthinking & MonitoringPropositionality & WeightShame & EmbarrassmentAnxiety & Social JudgmentHelplessness & Agency

Codes (1)

public_speaking