your disfluency is intense, not intensive* Sounds like what you did was Fluency Shaping therapy and your result is very typical. You go away somewhere, learn some new techniques that works at first but then fails. You are a smart guy, your analysis is exactly why it worked there but not when you came home. It is also because it is new and serves as a distraction, but eventually it fades and no longer works, especially once you get back home to the "real world". That's probably why it didnt work as well the second time, because it wasn't as new and distracting. I hope your father can understand that it is not your fault and you are not a failure. It is simply a very incomplete therapy and most people have exactly the same experience as you. You are not lazy. It's not like you don't care or don't try. But the therapy is very limited and in my opinion only good for a very specific type of person. When fluency shaping went away for me, I also thought that the only option I had. But I knew other people who stuttered who were able to improve their situation and did not have to change the way they spoke. I later learned the real way to get a true change isn't changing how you speak, but changing how you feel. How you feel about yourself, how you feel about your stuttering, and when you are able to accept yourself as a person who stutters and be ok with it, then you will finally be free of the pain. You will not be free of stuttering, but you will be able to stutter without the fear and anxiety of it. When I learned that there was an option other than fluency, that's when I really had hope. Acceptance is what I think is right for me and i've seen it help many people who stutter say what they want, do what they want, and they do it all while stuttering. And they don't care and no one else cares either. Because they are communicating well. Browse through the Stuttertalk.com episodes. They are almost all good, but there a lot of the earlier ones or the one that talk about acceptance I think are the best. If you want an intensive program and have money to travel, I can recommend programs in America. But if not, just getting support is crucial. Oftentimes support and sharing is more helpful than many therapies. I think stuttertalk and stuttersocial are great places to start. Good luck and let me know if you have any questions.