Content
My first date Hello everybody, I'm a 23-year-old guy, and yesterday I went on my first ever date. The previous two times I was supposed to go on a date ended with the person unmatching me on the day we were supposed to meet. This time, I wasn’t really expecting anything. I was just glad that someone actually wanted to meet me and was looking forward to having a good time despite my stutter. I wasn't nervous about my stutter. I’ve sort of accepted it and am relatively comfortable with it. I decided not to tell her about it beforehand because I didn’t want to make her biased. I don’t speak much during my day, so my stutter appears a lot less severe than it actually is, even to me. But when I interact more with people, I realize that my stutter is more noticeable. When I first stuttered around her, she thought I was having a seizure or something, but once I told her I had a condition, she was fine with it. At least, she didn’t show any reaction. Overall, the date went pretty decently, considering it was my first one. We talked about usual things, etc. However, I stuttered on almost every sentence. At times, it was pretty bad, with me blocking or stuttering multiple times on a single word. The next day, she didn’t text back. I’m not upset about that. I wasn’t very keen on a second date either, as I didn’t feel much attraction. Honestly, we didn’t have much chemistry, and my stuttering made it even harder to connect. This brings me to a few questions: 1. What goes on in the minds of people (mainly the opposite gender) when someone stutters? I’m told that a lot of girls find stuttering cute, but I assume what they mean by stuttering is just general nervousness and awkwardness, not full-blown blocking, facial grimaces, and other secondary behaviors. 2. For people in relationships, are you fluent with your partner? I’m curious about this. For example, I’m quite fluent with my family members, but despite knowing my best friends for years, I still stutter a lot with them. Did you initially stutter with your partner, but eventually become relatively fluent with them because they’re non-judgmental and caring? My friends are pretty non-judgmental too, but that doesn’t stop me from stuttering. 3. Why are stutters usually more fluent with ourselves or with close family/friends but not with other people? Why can’t scientists and researchers figure out the exact reason for this and use that knowledge to help us? Thanks for reading!