have you tried any therapy for speech and counseling for self-esteem issues you describe? is there anything that helps your speech even slightly by a bit you know it works for you? self confidence is important for speech in general so never accept the notion of being broken by other peoples judgement bc it will lead to a bad downward spiral. as a guy i can tell you by nature men tend to be shallow and as long as you are not missing a leg or an eye and happen to be a girl you will do fine but in order for that to happen give a poor guy you think who is decent a chance.