You sound very mature for your age. I am 48 and it took me a long time to accept it. As has been mentioned, accepting it allows you to release a lot of the anger and bitterness. I love motivational quotes as they steer me in the right direction if I am having a bad day. Below is one of my favorites, that I got from this sub. You have been assigned this mountain to show others it can be moved. Some others that I really like: Something will grow from all that you are going through and it will be you. You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.